Friday, March 8, 2013

International Women's Day

Until today, I did not know this existed. I also did not know that March is Women's History Month. Amidst all of the posts about empowering women, and women's equality today, for which I am grateful, the first thing that comes to mind is a scene from Mona Lisa Smile.

Julia Roberts plays the part of Katherine Watson, a progressive woman in the 1950's trying to change the role women play in society by teaching at a women's college. In this scene she is talking to one of her students, Joan Brandwyn (played by Julia Stiles). Joan has two strong desires: to be a lawyer, and to have a family. She gets accepted, but decides to pursue having a family instead. This is how things play out when Katherine learns of her decision.

Katherine Watson: There are seven law schools within 45 minutes of Philadelphia. You can study and get dinner on the table by 5:00.

Joan Brandwyn: It's too late.

Katherine Watson: No, some of them accept late admissions! Now, I was upset at first, I can tell you that. When Tommy came to me at the dance and told me he was accepted to Penn, I thought, 'Oh God, her fate is sealed! She's worked so hard, how can she throw it all away?' But then I realized you won't have to! You can bake your cake and eat it too! It's just wonderful!
Joan Brandwyn: We're married. We eloped over the weekend. Turned out he was petrified of a bit ceremony, so we did a sort of spur-of-the-moment thing. Very romantic.
[Katherine is stunned]

Joan Brandwyn: It was my choice, not to go. He would have supported it.

Katherine Watson: But you don't have to choose!
Joan Brandwyn: No, I have to. I want a home, I want a family! That's not something I'll sacrifice.

Katherine Watson: No one's asking you to sacrifice that, Joan. I just want you to understand that you can do both.

Joan Brandwyn: Do you think I'll wake up one morning and regret not being a lawyer?

Katherine Watson: Yes, I'm afraid that you will.

Joan Brandwyn: Not as much as I'd regret not having a family, not being there to raise them. I know exactly what I'm doing and it doesn't make me any less smart. This must seem terrible to you.

Katherine Watson: I didn't say that.

Joan Brandwyn: Sure you did. You always do. You stand in class and tell us to look beyond the image, but you don't. To you a housewife is someone who sold her soul for a center hall colonial. She has no depth, no intellect, no interests. You're the one who said I could do anything I wanted. This is what I want.

The thing that always strikes me in this scene is that as much as Katherine fights to give her girls the opportunity to have anything they want, she almost completely dismisses the fact that some of them are not simply conforming to society. What some of them truly want is to stay at home and raise a family.

In today's world, women have more choices than ever, but with that comes a shift in societal expectations. As we celebrate the the progress made for women in in our world, lets remember that with that progress remains the right to do things traditionally too.